I've been done with my first draft for a few months now and have re-written parts of it over and over... and over again. I've been letting it sit for a while and now it's time I go back and read it again with a clear mind. I have certain aspects that I already know I want to change. I will not get into details of the book at the moment, I'm not ready because the book is not ready.
I should be working on it right now, I know, but I'm busy drinking coffee and watching my kids play and hoping I magically come up with all the answers. I probably should be outlining but I cannot do that with my books for the life of me. I liked it back in high school and college, I thought outlining was the answer to all my prayers when I had to write anything but not now. I tried it and found myself staring at my screen for far too long. So that went out the window and instead I jumped into my thoughts and let the characters guide me. I have a fairly good idea of where I want my stories to go but what happens in between surprises me just as much as it would anyone who *might* read them.
I'm busy trying to figure out how to find a good copy editor/proofreader that I can actually afford. This whole you get what you pay for or you don't pay so you don't get is killing me. I also don't want to get taken advantage of so the whole thing is turning into a nightmare. And then I have to figure out the cover and who I can get to design it, again, someone that I can afford and that wont surprise me by making me pay for something that's already out there or will be after I've paid for it. Who and how do you trust? blah, blah, blah... who, when, how? I just have to remember to keep my determination alive and keep on going, right? What's the point of giving up before I start? No point, exactly.